Monday, December 10, 2007

This Christmas

I've always been very enthusiastic about the Christmas season. As a kid I continually pushed my parents to buy a tree earlier in December and to wake up earlier when Christmas morning rolled around. It seemed that we only had so much time and there truly wasn't a minute to lose. Even as a missionary I got caught up in the Christmas Spirit and wanted to spread that Christmas Cheer for as long as it was in season. The night of Christmas day was the saddest night of the year: it was over and I had another year to wait.
This year, though, there's no anticipation, no tree-trimming, and very little Christmas cheer to be spoken of. Mind you, this isn't to say that I'm unhappy; I'm just surprised that I'm not experiencing the extra helping of energy and eager anticipation that usually acts like a sort of drug for me around the holiday season. Maybe I'm finally growing up and losing my ties to insignificant traditions and meaningless commercialism that has become as much a part of the season as the Reason itself. It's a scary thought. There is certainly no reason to abandon something so positive and uplifting, though it seems I have. But maybe this year it's my turn to count myself among the magi. Let's face it, the shepherds had it easy: angelic visitations, a late-night choir concert in the sky, and a quick walk to the stable in Bethlehem. Sometimes, the journey is longer and the signs far more distant. Sometimes it's more difficult, but the longer the journey the sweeter it is when you finally reach your destination. Nothing has come easily this year. Not even Christmas. And that's okay.
Well, I guess there's no use going on about it. Christmas is coming on fast and if I can't watch "Rudolph" without rolling my eyes this year, I can still look forward to the end of a semester well-done, time with my family, and a the beginning of a new year. 2008 will be great. And Christmas '08? Who knows...

1 comment:

Heidi said...

I like your comparison to the magi--it's how I feel sometimes. Ironically, this is the first Christmas in a few years that I feel giddy about. It hit me last night as I was decorating my little tree. You'll get it. Maybe Christmas morning, but you'll get it. And some years are harder than others. :)